Diazien "Arizon" Hossencofft was a chameleon-like con artist who wove elaborate deceptions to exploit vulnerable women for money, control, sex, and ego gratification over a period of at least two decades. By faking identities, fabricating tall tales, and presenting himself as a wealthy doctor, alien savior, cancer victim, and more – he morally seduced lovers, friends and even a wife into his web of lies. An investigation into Hossencofft’s trail of manipulation and the violent fate of his ex-wife Girly Chew reveals disturbing parallels to emotionally abusive patterns that women face daily – inverted and amplified to pathological extremes. How can we educate, empower and support victims in spotting the warning signs and fighting back against their own “master manipulator”?
The Timeline of Betrayal
While Hossencofft’s earlier life remains murky, records show his deception-filled crimes began catching up with him in the late 90s. Here are 9 milestones in the twisted manipulator’s career:
1996 – Hossencofft meets second wife Girly Chew through a dating service. He convinces her he is a wealthy doctor running a medical research company who attended MIT and Columbia. None of this is true.
1997 – After a sudden lavish wedding to Chew, Hossencofft’s lies catch up to him. He admits to Chew none of his background is real and she kicks him out after only months together.
1998 – Despite the lies, Chew takes Hossencofft back when he claims he has brain cancer. She withdraws her life savings to pay for his medical treatment in Houston. There, doctors uncover the cancer is likely fake. An angry confrontation about more lies ends the relationship permanently.
July 1999 – After harassing Chew with threats for almost a year, Hossencofft convinces her to meet one last time. She visits his home in New Mexico and mysteriously disappears after that meeting, never to be seen again.
September, 1999 – Weeks after Chew vanishes, Hossencofft begins dating new girlfriend Linda Henning. He spins fantastical stories to Henning and her friends about being a 2,000 year old alien savior with supernatural healing powers. Henning becomes spellbound and obsessed.
December, 1999 – Hossencofft secretly marries Henning while still legally married to missing ex-wife Girly Chew. He convinces Henning to spend her $400,000+ retirement savings to buy them a luxury home fitting for an “alien prince”.
June, 2000 – Henning officially quits her career to devote herself fully to Hossencofft’s “alien mission”. Ex-wife Chew is declared legally dead, freeing Hossencofft of bigamy charges. He begins introducing Henning as his “alien wife”.
May, 2001 – Acting on tips, police arrest Hossencofft and Henning for the murder of Girly Chew. Forensic evidence from Chew’s abandoned car links them to her disappearance. Hossencofft had continued driving it while she was missing.
June, 2002 – Henning testifies that Hossencofft killed Chew to “free her soul” per alien directives. But the body was never recovered in New Mexico’s vast desert. Henning is convicted of murder, Hossencofft pleads guilty after avoiding a death sentence. Both are serving life sentences.
Across two decades and relationships with at least four women – one ending in death and disappearace – similar patterns emerge of Hossencofft’s cunning psychological manipulation tailored to each target.
Portrait of a Master Manipulator
“He seems to have a gift for deceit – for making up stories so detailed and believable that people want to buy into them,” said Dr. Cynthia Stout, forensic psychologist. “He’s the type easily able to spot vulnerabilities in others and use that to exploit them.”
Manipulators like Hossencofft display distinct traits chillingly similar to emotional abusers – just dialed to extreme settings:
Fake Personas – Hossencofft adapted fake backgrounds to impress targets and become their ideal partner – wealthy Ivy league doctor, alien savior, cancer victim warranting sympathy. This “love bombing” builds trust and emotional investment to enable future abuse.
Bold Lies – Fact checkers uncover Hossencofft’s cancer, MIT degree and more were outright fabrications. Yet he told lies so bold few initially questioned. This approach pressures victims to confront difficult truths only after already bonding to the manipulator when the sunk cost fallacy sets in.
Predatory Grooming – Abusers patiently build intimacy, erode self-esteem and isolate victims from other support over months or years – gradually escalating exploitation. Hossencofft likewise carefully groomed lovers until reaching “critical belief mass” where the most outlandish stories became believable.
Adapting Stories – Skilled manipulators tweak their deceit based on targets. Hossencofft adjusted personas and crocodile tears to persuade dozens over 20+ years. Such “iterative lying” helps avoid getting caught while keeping stories straight.
Cultivating Craziness – Blatant lies and irrational demands make abusive targets seem “crazy” for doubting the manipulator, destroying credibility. Hossencofft likewise drove women to utter desperation, though his galactic tall tales took this gaslighting approach to new heights.
Money & Control – Ultimately con artists serve themselves. Hossencofft kept ex-wife Chew in his grip by exploiting her savings and career. financil incentives and forced isolation gave him total domninance to abuse physically and emotionally.
While clearly displaying sociopathic and narcissistic qualities, the exact clinical diagnosis remains unknown. Regardless, Hossencofft is tragically not unique in the exploitative manipulation millions suffer daily online or in toxic relationships.
“At milder levels these behaviors pervade industries like tech and gaming built on dishonest hype and targeting addicts,” said abuse survivor Sara Lynn. “When giant corporations act so deceptively themselves, it normalizes emotional exploitation. But manipulation should never be acceptable no matter the scale or source.”
The Disappearance of Girly Chew: Accident or Murder?
Girly Chew became Hossencofft’s first known murder target after attempting to break free of his control and lies repeatedly during their short, doomed marriage. Her mysterious 1999 disappearance leaving Hossencofft’s New Mexico home would remain an open missing person case until both Hossencofft and lover Linda Henning faced murder charges two years later. But with Chew’s body never found, how certain can police be she was actually murdered rather than leaving voluntarily? We explore three theories on her vanishing act:
1) Desert Burial – Police alleged Hossencofft killed Chew by bludgeoning just after she arrived in July, 1999 to finalize divorce details, catching her off guard. He and new girlfriend Henning then buried Chew’s body deep in the New Mexico desert. Without the remains, prosecutors relied on forensic blood evidence found splattered in her abandoned car Hossencofft had kept driving. Chew’s stepfather also reported she was terrified of Hossencofft threatening her life after stalking her across multiple states.
2) Double-Crossed Escape – Some friends speculated Chew realized her grave danger from Hossencofft and worked with him to fake her death – vanishing voluntarily into hiding instead. Under this theory, the blood stains were deliberately planted red herring evidence. Hossencofft would avoid a lengthy real murder investigation while Chew quietly built a new identity. But she failed to fully cover her tracks.
3) Accident Cover-up – It’s possible Chew died accidentally from a fall during a heated divorce argument with volatility documented between them Or maybe she stormed off into the desert alone on foot and succumbed to exposure, with Hossencofft later hiding involvement to avoid blame whether directly responsible or not. This scenario matches his avoiding the topic for years.
With zero direct witnesses and no body after 20+ years, we may never know absolutely how Chew left this world. But the most likely explanation points to her tragically losing her life in the process of trying to win back freedom from Hossencofft’s nightmare world.
Escaping the “Real-Life Puppet Master”: Survival Stories
Hossencofft’s deceit-filled legacy serves as a cautionary tale on emotional manipulation and abuse suffered by women daily – though amplified to criminally extreme levels in this case. Fellow survivors of intimate partner violence highlight the cunning tactics abusers employ to exert control similar to Hossencofft’s approach:
“It was like dating Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde – he’d oscillate between ideal attentive partner and sudden crazy anger. Only months later did I realize it was all an act to keep me anxious and working to please him.”, says Jenny L, recovering from an abusive 5-year relationship.
“When my demands for expensive gifts were suddenly ignored after two years together, at first I thought his love was fading”, admits Lisa P, 47. “But in hindsight, this “punishing” phase was planned all along to make me desperate to “earn” back his affection.”
Yet with awareness, courage and support networks, targets of emotional manipulation can escape and heal. Many survivors of intimate partner violence like Chew share their stories to help others identify the warning signs early enough to get out safely. Their advice includes:
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Trust Instincts – If a new partner seems “too perfect” or makes odd requests, address concerns directly rather than ignoring doubts. Controlling people will resist questions threatening their facade.
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Watch for Inconsistencies – Master manipulators betray themselves through lies that don’t add up over time. Keep a private journal tracking any shifting stories, odd behavior or factual discrepancies that feel “off”.
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Maintain Perspective – Abusers isolate victims from outside input deliberately. Make sure to stay anchored in interests, career, family, and friendships that bring confidence in your own sanity.
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Set Boundaries – Require the baseline respect every healthy relationship deserves – no namecalling, dishonesty, violence or emotional blackmail. Walk away at the very first violation.
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Talk To Experts – If recovering from abuse, know that confusion, shame and urges to return are normal during trauma bonding. Seek counseling from domestic violence specialists to process the violation and regain self-worth and safety.
While ruthless predators like Hossencofft are extreme examples on the manipulation spectrum, experts advise approaching any new relationship with calibrated caution.
“A manipulator’s toolkit boils down to exploiting hardwired social vulnerabilities present to some degree in everyone,” says psychiatrist Dr. Leann Zurbriggen. “With self-awareness, setting boundaries, and securing our basic needs from multiple healthy sources – we deprive emotional vampires of openings to hook into.”
By empowering more victims of abuse to share their stories, our society moves closer to zero tolerance for manipulation or partner violence in any form.
Warning Signs of Manipulation To Watch For
Based on well-documented behaviors of Hossencofft and studies around domestic emotional abuse, here are 5 key signs of a potentially exploitative partner:
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| Manipulation Tactic | Example Behaviors |
|---|---|
| Love Bombing: Lavish gifts and praise in beginning of relationship | – Extravagant getaways within weeks of dating – Over the top compliments and affection |
| Gaslighting: Denying/altering reality to destabilize victim’s sanity | – Lying while accusing you of poor memory or “misunderstanding” – Hiding/moving objects then suggesting you lost them |
| Isolation: Cutting off victim’s connections to outside support | – Getting angry when you make independent plans – Discouraging relationships with friends/family |
| Idealization: Pressuring to meet impossible standards | – Making you feel like you must be perfect to “deserve” their love – Constant criticism of small flaws in appearance or behavior |
| Blame-shifting: Making you feel responsible for theirchoices | – Saying “you made me yell at you” after angry outbursts – Guilting you into financial or sexual acts you’re uncomfortable with |
“No single problematic behavior automatically proves manipulation or abuse,” says Zurbriggen. “But multiple combined signs failing to improve after clearly communicating boundaries are your cue to safely exit a suspicious situation.”
Expert Advice on Escaping Emotional Manipulators
Psychologist Dr. Martha Garrison has 20+ years experience counseling victims escaping intimate partner violence. She shares crucial guidance on getting out safely when trapped in an emotionally abusive relationship:
How do you advise spotting manipulative or predatory people early when dating?
“Observe how a promising new partner responds when you voice needs, concerns or set boundaries – even minor ones. Controlling personalities may resist or react angrily to anything potentially threatening their power. Start keeping a journal to track even subtle red flag reactions.”
What tips do you have for confronting a partner about lies or manipulation and working to change the dynamic?
“Don’t confront specific lies, but focus on how repeated dishonesty destroys trust in a relationship. Give them opportunities, space and time to explain any misunderstanding. But when fundamental integrity issues continue despite multiple chances, it likely means the problem lies deeper within their worldview.”
When is it time to fully extract yourself from an abusive situation?
“Once multiple attempts to healthfully communicate issues are ignored and disrespectful behaviors ramp up rather than improve, it’s time to safely exit no matter the sunk cost fallacy tempting you to keep trying. Documenting evidence in secret and subtly securing your assets/allies ahead of announcing the breakup protects against retaliation.”
What advice would you give women moving forward after escaping an emotionally manipulative relationship to heal?
“Securing physical safety is the first priority when leaving any abuse situation. Consider moving locations and maintain only essential contact if required legally with the abuser to conclude financial or custodial obligations. Then be patient rebuilding self-worth and trusting others again through counseling, community support groups, focusing on passions, and healthy new connections.”
“It takes tremendous courage to admit manipulation and walk away once bonded closely”, Dr Garrison acknowledges. “But continuing to invest in a fundamentally unhealthy dynamic only brings further sunken costs and lost joy. By choosing to write their own life story going forward, survivors regain authorship stolen from them.”